Massive Corporation
 AboutFelineThey
Feline
We are warm and fuzzy

 
We're More Than a Faceless Conglomerate: We Have Cats

Given the common perception of large corporations as heartless, cold and power-hungry, we recognize the importance of a more likeable image. Through extensive market research, surveys and comparison-testing, we have determined the most effective way to affect public perception of a "kindler, gentler" conglomerate is through the use of cats. Hence, the development of our Feline division.

Spearheaded by a task force of three felines (below, left), operation "Warm and Fuzzy" is our latest directive in this effort. Following is a closer look at our team and their unique qualifications.

Feed me  
Name:   Merlin
Breed:   Persian
Skills:   Communicates well (fussy)
Goals:   To eat as much as possible, and to enjoy the outdoors often.
     
Love me  
Name:   Boo ("Boo-Boo")
Breed:   Persian
Skills:   Manipulative charm, can sleep in boxes.
Goals:   Your unending devotion and affection.
     
Back off  
Name:   Chloé
Breed:   Domestic Shorthair
Skills:   Zippiness, not afraid to show belly
Goals:   To be top cat, even if it means silently suffocating a sleeping human.